Comparing

As parents we spend a lot of time comparing our kids to others. And maybe even more so we compare our kids' experiences with growing up to our own. For me this has been a challenge. When I grew up in Atlanta it couldn't have been more idyllic. I grew up in a very cohesive neighborhood and the street where I lived was filled with children about my age. We grew up together as natural playmates. We played 'cops and robbers', tag, sports in the street (mostly football) and in our backyards. The streets were safe and the parents were friends with each other, or at least knew each other well.
That was when middle class folks all did the same thing. Had kids at the same time. Mothers didn't work outside the home. Things have changed.
When my son was younger there were no other kids on our street his age. Playdates had to be scheduled. His social life doesn't seem as rich as the one I experienced at his age.
But this is my perspective, not his. From his point of view his life is good. He has friends at school and he does have a couple of very good friends. He's involved in scouting and plays soccer. I still wish that he could experience what I did, but I know that he is not missing out. He is having his own life and will look back fondly and worry that his child won't enjoy what he did. And so it goes....
When folks are depressed they often experience 'thought distortions'. These arise when only a limited part of a very rich reality is focused on.
Be a caring, loving, consistent and creative parent. In doing so you will create fertile ground for your child. But you won't be able to control all the variables or the exact direction in which growth will occur. And that is a good thing.